When things come full Circle
by Barson4Ever
Summary: When things from Raf's past come back to haunt him
1. Chapter 1

You were on the way to the hospital with your 9-year-old daughter Maddie in the backseat. You kept looking at her in the rearview needed help, and she wasn't saying much. Just that someone had hurt didn't think the babysitter did anything, but that was the only person besides you that had access to your daughter. You walked her into the hospital, explained the situation and let the nurse get both of you settled in a room. After the doctor finished, they said they were calling the police,

You told them,

"No, I know someone I'll get them to come."

They nodded, after they looked like they were going to argue with you, when you said you were calling an SVU detective. They left you and your daughter alone. You got out your phone and while you called Rafael, she looked at you.

"Rafi?"

"Yeah, will you be okay with him, someone who he used to work with is coming as well to talk to you?"

She nodded. You nodded back. Rafael picked up on the second ring.

"Hi, mi Amor."

"Rafi.." you whispered, starting to break down.

"What is it?"

"Something happened, come to Mercy please."

"What happened?"

"I need you to come down here, bring Liv too." From the way Rafael talked about her and her son Noah, you knew she would be the best option.

"Okay, Liv and I will be there soon. Love you."

"Love you, too."

You hung up, looking at your daughter.

"Rafi is on his way."

You sat outside Maddie's room, wanting a few minutes to yourself and waiting for your boyfriend and a woman whom you'd never met, but heard nothing but great things about. About 15 minutes later a nurse walked up to you, you looked at her questioningly.

"A Rafael Barba?"

You smiled and nodded.

The nurse smiled back and slipped away just as you saw Rafael. Rafael was frowning and looked worried as he walked up to you.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

"Maddie." You whispered.

Liv walked up behind him, Raf looked at the door, across the hallway at the door with your daughter's name on it.

"What happened to Maddie? Why is she in an exam room?" He asked quietly.

"I found blood on some of her bedding, underwear…" you whispered.

"Any ideas?" Raf asked.

"None, the babysitter.. But she's 16. I had a background check done, met her parents."

Raf looked at Liv,

"Have you noticed anybody hanging around your place." He asked.

"No." You said.

"Rafa, let me talk to the doctor, they did a rape kit didn't they?" Liv asked.

You nodded.

Liv went to talk to the doctor, you both sat there.

"I'm going to go back, in." You said, as you got up.

He smiled at you, sadly. He got up too, staying still until you turned back and asked,

"You coming?" you asked.

Raf nodded and followed you, in.

Maddie was laying in bed, she turned over to see who had come in. She saw Raf and smiled, a far cry from the usual greeting of yelling his name and running into his arms as fast as she could when he came into a room.

"Hey there's my amiga." Raf smiled.

"Rafa." She stretched a hand out to him.

He walked to her, gently grabbing her hand. You smiled at the interaction, Maddie suddenly frowned and squeezed Raf's hand.

"What's wrong honey?" You asked.

She sniffed and quietly recounted

"They said Raf hurt their child, that they were going to hurt the closest Raf had to a child and that Raf was going to get payback."

Raf's face drained of color, as fast she said it. You looked at him, and he motioned you out

"What's wrong, Rafi?"

Raf looked at you, then sat the both of you down.

"Remember the reason I left the DA's office?"

"Yeah the case with the baby that had MDDS?" you said.

Raf looked like he wanted to kill himself.

"I'm so sorry, you and Maddie got caught up in this." Raf said, tears running down his face.

"Rafa you did what you thought was best, I was there for the 8 month fall out and getting back on your feet mentally, remember?" you whispered.

"Of course I do, you and Maddie saved me, without the two of you I'd probably have committed suicide, and be dead." Raf whispered, still softly crying.

"And now you and I will be there for Maddie and Liv and the squad will catch the son of the bitch that did it."

Raf took a deep breath, nodding his pulled him close, kissed him.

"Can I see her, again?" Raf asked.

You nodded and both of you went in, sitting by her bedside watching her sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

Raf looked up, you had fallen asleep in his arms on the small couch in Maddie's room. You had cried yourself to sleep, while Raf held you tight. Raf kissed your head and whispered how sorry he was to have brought this on you and Maddie. There was a soft knock, he then saw Liv's head popping in and smiling at you both. She motioned him out, Raf kissed your head gently before laying you on the couch, using his jacket as a pillow. As soon as the door shut, he was in DA mode.

"Get any DNA?"

"Yeah, they got a match…."

"Aaron Householder."

Liv looked off, and sighed.

"I'll take that as a yes." Raf took a deep breath, running his hand through his hair.

"I've already filled in Sonny. Sonny and I are still the only two to know how long you and Y/N have been involved."

"Just you and Sonny?"

Liv nodded.

"Okay, so what's the plan?"

"Raf you know I can't discuss that with you, I have to run that by Stone."

"Of course, Stone." Raf rolled his eyes.

"Your the one who left Rafa."

"I know, it's not your fault, McCoy offered him my place." Raf sighed.

Liv nodded.

"Just promise me you'll get this asshole."

"We will." Liv smiled and left swinging by the precinct and filling in Amanda.

"How's Barba?" She asked as they was going to the Householder's house.

"What do you mean?"

"Sonny told us what happened to Maddie, and we knew about them getting together. Sonny and Y/N go back."

"He's okay for the most part condering."

They pulled up to the house, they got out and walked to the front door.

"NYPD!" Amanda yelled, knocking loudly.

The door opened to find the Householders.

"What can I help you with?" Aaron asked.

"Where were you last night between 6pm to 11pm?" Amanda asked.

"Home with my wife." Aaron looked at Maggie.

Maggie nodded.

"Do you know a Maddie YLN?"

"No."Aaron said.

"Your DNA came back on her 9 year old girl.

Aaron started yelling, saying,

"I don't know what your talking about or what's going on!"

Amanda put cuffs on him and read him his rights, as she walked him to the car. Liv didn't even bother looking at Maggie, just texting Raf as she walked back to car.

At the hospital

You were surprised by how attached Maddie was to Rafael, once she woke up. She wouldn't let him go out of her sight. She was asleep again. You and Raf were cuddled on the couch in the corner of her room. You looked up at Raf and kissed him softly. He smiled into the kiss, after you broke it you laid your head on is chest. You watched her sleep, next thing you knew you were crying saying you were a bad parent and Raf was hushing you and saying you were wrong that you were the best mom he knew beside Liv.

"You mean that?" You asked.

"Yes, mi amor I do." Raf kissed your head.

You laid on his chest, thinking about your life. It wasn't the best you were 31 being 22 when Maddie was teenage years finally caught up to you when you found out you were pregnant. Maddie's father had gotten killed after a drug deal went wrong. Right after her father had died, you had found out you were pregnant. You had gotten clean and had stayed clean ever since. You and Raf met about a year ago, Raf and Maddie had become firm friends the instant they met and realising they had the same sense of humour only cemented it. The bond between them amazed you as it happened so quickly. Maybe this kind of instantaneous and deep friendship between an adult and a child was normal, maybe not, you wouldn't know. All you knew was you loved to see the marvellous bond they had which was only getting stronger as time went by.


	3. Chapter 3

Amanda and Liv took Aaron back down to the precinct. His lawyer met them, but Aaron waived attorney privileges so now it was just him, Sonny, and Liv in the box.

"I did it, okay." Aaron said.

"So you did it? Your going to just confess after you told my lieutenant and detective you didn't have nothing to do with." Sonny asked.

"I didn't want my wife to know, she doesn't think I did it."

Liv scoffed.

"She's still going to now."

Aaron shrugged.

"My marriage wasn't the same since the trial. Maggie is in the process of filing divorce. I'm just glad Rafael Barba is feeling pain just like the pain he left me with. I was having an affair with the babysitter and I saw my chance, it was too good to miss."

"Carisi put him in the holding cell, while he waited for the bus to pick him up and take him to Riker's."

Sonny finished up in holding and let Liv know so she could tell Rafael that Aaron would be heading to Rikers soon.

"Liv?" you answered.

"Hey Y/n, where's Rafa?"

"Asleep, he's exhausted."

"I bet all three of you are."

You hummed, your response.

"I was calling Rafael to update him."

"Aaron Householder? Do you have him in custody?"

"How did you... "

"He and I had a conversation, right before we begin our relationship. He told me everything."

Liv was quiet.

"I'm glad he has someone besides his mother and I to look after him. How's Maddie?" Liv finally said.

"Okay, she's not letting us out of her sight. How did he…. When?" You asked unsure how to word the question you didn't really want to ask..

"According to him he was having a affair with your babysitter, they were together earlier that night he did it while she was asleep, he was blackmailing her and he drugged her so he could do it without her knowing "

"How did I not see this?" You asked.

" Y/N, not everyone sees it. My son's biological grandmother came into his life, got me comfortable with her, then she kidnapped him. If it wasn't for Rafael, we wouldn't have got him back."

You looked over at him, and smiled.

"Yeah, that's sounds like him."

About that time you saw he had woken up, you got off the phone and walked over to him,

"Uh oh, my girlfriend and my best friend been talking." he smirked.

You kissed him, that was when you realized he had tears falling down his face.

"Raf, what's wrong?"

"I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry."

You kissed him,

"It's okay, shh." you kissed him again, laying your head on his chest as he wrapped his arms around you tightly.

"You know I think of her like a daughter, right?"

"Yeah?"

"I want to be more, not right now but later down the road, if that's alright with you and Maddie."

You kissed him, smiling as he kissed you back. He broke the kiss, and you both sat there, both quiet just looking and smiling at each other. After a while the doctor came in and told them,

"If Maddie is ready, you can take her home."

You laughed when she lit up at the doctor's words. After Maddie was ready, the three of you left you in the back seat her. As Raf drove closer to your apartment Maddie was getting upset.

"Don't want to go back there." she balled, starting to cry before you could ask.

You sighed as you looked at Raf in the rearview mirror.

"How about if your mami is okay with it, you and she can stay at my house I have a guest room." Raf suggested.

"You sure Raf?"

"I am, if you're on board?" Raf said.

You smiled and nodded, Raf stopped at your place so you could get two bags for you and Maddie. While you were inside Raf was checking his emails, when he felt arms around his neck. He looked up, to see Maddie

"Need something you forgot to tell mami?"

"No, uh can I ask you something?" she asked.

"Anything."

"Uh, what's daddy in spanish?"

"Uh.. papi. Why?"

"Can I call you…"

Raf felt tears on his neck, as she buried her head into his neck. Raf carefully placed his hand on her arms and leaned his head against her's.

"Mija, you can call me anything you want." he whispered.

You opened the door, seeing this and smiled.

"Mami can I?"

"Can you what?" You asked, missing that part of the conversation.

"Can I call Rafi, papi?"

You started crying, Raf took your hand squeezing it.

"Yeah, sweetheart if you want to." you said.

"Alright Mija get your seatbelt on we going home."

When the three of you got to Raf's apartment, your apartment as Raf had told the both of you. You carried her in and Raf had your bags, as he opened the door you looked around. Raf sat your bags beside a door, then pointed to the other's,

"Your's and Maddie's room, and bathroom." Raf said.

"Thanks Rafi."

"De nada."

"Mami bath?"

"There's a bathtub and I think bubble bath under the sink."

"Bubble Bath?"

"My mother left it here, when she stayed while her apartment was being redone."

"Would you like that Mad?" You asked.

"Yes Mami. Papi?"

"Yes mi amor?"

"Hot chocolate and cookies?"

Raf gently place a hand on her cheek.

"Hot chocolate and cookies, if it's okay with Mami before dinner."

You smiled and let her go to the bathroom and helping Maddie find everything.

"Mami...could you?" She looked at you then the door.

"You sure you don't need help?"

"Yes Mami."

You nodded, and left closing the door. You stood for a while outside the door, until arms wrapped around you pulling you into the bedroom

"She okay?" Raf asked.

"Think so, I'm going to go check on her in a minute."

"You can take a shower in there." He waved his hand toward the other bathroom.

"Thanks Rafi."

"De nada, mi amor."

As he walked out you noticed he was in pajama pants and long sleeve shirt. You took a quick bath put on your flannel pjs and dried your hair. By the time you walked out to the living room Maddie and Raf were cuddle under a blanket, with two hot chocolates. You sat on the other side of Raf, you kissed his cheek,

" you two hungry?" You asked.

Raf shook his head no, Maddie wanted one cookie. You turned on the tv but noticed Maddie was half asleep against Rafael's chest.

"I'll get her to bed." You whispered.

Maddie woke not wanting you to pick her up. You thought it was odd, you just shook it off. Raf carried her to bed, laying her down and covering up.

"Buenas noches mija."

"Night Papi. Night Mami."

"Night Mad."

You and Raf went to his room, both laying down.

"Te amo, mi amor."

"Night papi." You smirked as you kissed him.


	4. Chapter 4

The next few weeks came and went, Stone prosecuted both Aaron and Maggie. It turned out they had been in on it together. You were shocked that maggie had been in the next room, making sure you babysitter didn't wake up while her SOB of a husband was in Maddie's room **.** The jury came back after only ten minutes of deliberation. Aaron was found guilty of Rape One and sentenced to 15 years and also put on the Sex Offenders Registry. Maggie was also found guilty as an accessory to Rape One and sentenced to 7 years, also going on the Registry. Raf sat beside you through it all holding Maddie who, despite both of you trying to dissuade her, wanted to be there for the sentencing. After it was over and they had taken the two of them back to the cells, the three of you sat there, while the court cleared out. After it was clear, Raf looked at you smiling then down at Maddie.

"You okay mija?"

Maddie nodded as she snuggled into Raf's shirt her head turned away so she couldn't see the man that did this to her.

"He's gone sweetheart," you whispered.

She peaked out, looking around and smiling at you and Raf, then at the squad.

"Papi, bad man gone?"

"He's gone mija, how about we invite everyone over including Noah and Jesse tomorrow?" Raf asked.

Maddie nodded.

That night Maddie wanted to sleep by herself though all through the trail she was sleeping with you and Raf. Raf tucked her in, sang her a lullaby and read a book, you were almost asleep when he came in curling up around you. You turned to face him, seeing his eyes shining with unshed tears.

"What's wrong Rafi?"

"She asked…" he took a deep breath and finished,

"What?"

"If I could keep her safe and adopt her, she told me she wanted me to be her papi."

You smirked and kissed him.

"Her 10th birthday is in 3 weeks, that would be a nice gift." You suggested.

"You think so? Are you sure you don't want more time?"

"I couldn't imagine my life without you and Maddie together in it. I couldn't think of anybody better to be her father. I would love a ring in the future but it's something that can wait until you are ready."

Raf was emotional, he had told you what a piece of shit his father was to him, what kind of husband he was to Lucia. Raf was nothing like his father, he was Maddie's, Noah's, and Jesse's, hell even Fin's grandson's favorite playmate. "

"You sure Y/N?"

"I'm absolutely sure, if your in it." You kissed him.

 **The next morning**

Rafael called Trevor getting the process for adopting Maddie going, so it would be official come her birthday. The squad came over around one, everyone enjoying a day off, talking and laughing. Maddie, Noah, and Jesse were running around having fun. But then Liv got a call needing all of the squad plus Raf, to go down to the precinct.

"I can watch Noah and Jesse." You said, hoping that would make things easier for Amanda and Liv.

"You sure Carino?" Raf asked.

"Si Rafa, I'm sure." You kissed him.

They all left, you and kids went back to playing. It was getting around 10 o'clock, so you washed the kids up, putting all three in Maddie's room.

Three hours later

The phone rang as you went to get a shower picking it up and answering it,

"Hey Rafi."

"Hey mi amor, I'm on my way home."

"Okay, is Liv and Amanda picking up the kids? They can stay."

"Liv and Amanda were busted, I told just go home and pick them up tomorrow."

"That's good, all three are asleep in Maddie's room."

Raf chuckled.

"I'll be home in 10 minutes."

You went to take a shower, then laid down. About the same time the front door opened and closed, you heard footsteps, then nothing. You looked out into the hall, seeing Raf looking in Maddie's room, you walked up to him as he looked in. After a few minutes, Raf grabbed your hand dragging you into your room and onto the bed. Both of you, laid down and cuddled up,

"Did you mean what you said last night? About Maddie?" Raf asked.

"About you wanting to adopt Maddie? Yes, I meant it."

"You sure, you don't want more time?" Raf looked at you, taking your hand.

"Down the road, do you?"

"I want to walk through that door every night and have that scene and the scenes today everyday." Raf whispered, rolling so he could look you in eye.

"I do too."

Raf kissed you,

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

"How about I text Liv and Amanda and we meet them for bunch and a playdate in the park?" Raf asked.

"Sounds good to me."


	5. Chapter 5

3 weeks later

It was the night before Maddie's 10th birthday party. You and Raf were wrapping up her gifts, including the big framed Adoption papers in a glass case because Raf wanted to go all out for Maddie. They were not signed yet just in case Maddie wasn't ready. You knew she wanted Raf to be her legal father, she wouldn't have asked him if she could called him papi if she wasn't ready, but Raf wanted to be sure.

"You sure you didn't forget anything?" Raf asked as he saw it was only 3 things, nothing to expensive.

"I ask her several times all she wanted was these."

"Was this before or after….?" Raf asked.

"Both, once before and several after."

Raf sighed, sitting on the couch beside you.

"Come on, don't go blaming yourself again **,** the Householders are in jail, everything is slowly going back to normal." you whispered.

"I know but I can't help it."

"I know, let's go to bed, a certain little girl will be waking us up as soon as it's daylight."

Raf chuckled, took your hand and headed to the bedroom.

 **The next Morning**

"Papi! Mami! Wake up!" Maddie said, landing on top of you and Raf.

"Oof, mija careful." Raf said hugging her.

"Sorry papi." Maddie said, laying her hand on his chest.

"Go out to the living room, and turn on the TV. We will be out in a minute." you whispered.

Maddie left, you turned so your head would be against Raf's chest.

"Come on we have to finish the cake and get ready." Raf whispered, nudging you.

You both got up and Raf started the coffee, while you set the cake out and started to ice it. Maddie watched as Raf went over to you putting his hands on your hips, saying

"Go get ready I'll finish this."

"You sure?" you asked as you turned in his arms.

Raf smirked and kissed you.

"Yes, go." he whispered.

Maddie turned back to the tv smiling as a song started on the show she was watching. Raf was focusing on icing the cake but he heard music coming from the living room **.** He looked up seeing Maddie singing and watching tv. She sang so beautifully, how could anybody hurt her he wondered and frowned, saying

"Maddie? Want to help finish the cake?"

She nodded as she got up, coming over. Raf pulled up a chair, she crawled up, Raf got behind her, putting his hands around her holding the icing bag together they finished the cake together, as you came out.

"Papi let me take over while, you get ready."

"Cake is done, the two of us need to get ready, though."

You looked at Maddie who had icing all over her.

"You two go get clean up, I'll clean up the kitchen." You chuckled.

They both headed down the hall, you shook your head at the mess, and started cleaning. Ten minutes later the doorbell rang and everyone was there. Noah, Maddie, and Jesse played with her new toys while the adults laughed and talked.

"How is Maddie doing?" Liv asked.

"Better, a lot better."

"How's Rafa?"

"He's doing better. He still feels so guilty he second guesses himself with Maddie. He is such a good man and a great papi to Maddie though. I keep telling him it wasn't his fault but he can't seem to believe me."

Liv gave you a smile,

"Keep telling him that, and he will believe one day."

"I plan to."

After cake and all the presents except Raf's special one everyone left. He wanted it to be just the three of you when he gave the adoption papers to Maddie. Maddie was in the floor playing with a game Sonny had given her when Raf said,

"Mija you forgot a present."

She looked at him, walking over to him as you both sat on the couch. You sat beside Raf as Maddie tore off the paper quickly then reading it the best she could being 10. She looked at you, then at Rafael.

"Why isn't it signed?"

"I just wanted to be sure that's what you still wanted to mija, well both of you." Raf looked at you.

"I want it, please mami!"

You smiled and nodded.

"Go ahead Rafael **,** sign it, the both of us wants you to join in our family."

" **You have to sign it to** **o** **,** **to** **say I have your permission to adopt Maddie."**

You signed it after Raf did then he got everything together to put back in his briefcase **.** Maddie followed him to his office, but Raf didn't know she was behind him as he put everything in his briefcase **.**

"When are you going to ask mami?"


	6. Chapter 6

"When are you going to ask Mami?"

Raf stopped and slowly turned, wincing as his knee protested.

"Ask Mami what? Mija?"

"To marry her."

Raf sighed, waving her over she sat in his lap.

"I'm not, I mean I will, down the road, but not right now."

"Why not right now? I know you have a ring, I saw it."

Raf got up, going to his desk pulling the ring box out.

"Come here mija."

Maddie came over to stand beside him, Raf sat at his desk and lifted her up into his lap.

"You okay?"

Maddie had stiffened as Raf lifted her up and then struggled to be put down again.

Maddie sniffled and looked up at Raf. With a trembling lip she said,

"yeah, I guess...I just remembered that he...the man lifted me onto his knee just like you did. I kind of went back to that night for a bit."

"Oh Maddie, I'm so sorry, I didn't realize. Do you want to go to your mom?" Raf said whilst moving the chair away from her.

"No, I'm okay now. It was just a flashback, I know you wouldn't do anything like that. Please don't treat me differently. By the time you put me down I knew it was you again. I think if you just ignore it when it happens it will make it easier to get back to normal. So come back over here, I think there was something you were going to show me." She grinned up at him mischievously.

"You still want to see it?"

"Yes please."

Raf opened up the box, letting Maddie see.

"It's pretty!"

"Shh mija, it's just like Mami and you."

Maddie looked at him, smiling.

"Love you, Papi." She kissed his cheek.

"Te amo." Raf whispered, kissing her cheek.

"When are you going to give it to her?"

"Our 1 year anniversary is in a couple of days I thought then, and take my two favorite girls out."

"Can I be involved? Can we do it tonight?"

"You're sure?"

"Please papi, I'll end up telling mami before then if I have to wait."

"Yes, if you want to."

"Yay!"

"Shh, mija." Raf chuckled, grabbing the ring box, putting it in his pocket.

Raf and Maddie came out of the study.

"Pjs, bedroom, movie time." you said

They both hurried off, as you came into your bedroom, they looked guilty.

"What did you two do?"

"Nothing mami." Maddie said.

You sat beside Raf cuddling with them, Maddie started the movie. Halfway through it you got up, going to the bathroom.

"Papi, now, please?!"

"Okay." Raf nodded.

You came back sitting beside Raf who leaned up, turning toward you.

"What you doing, Rafi?"

Raf got out the box.

"Y/N will you marry me?"

You had tears in your eyes, you put your head against his, both of you crying already.

"Yes, I will."

Raf kissed you, took the ring out of the box and put it on your finger. Maddie was crying, leaning against Raf's side as he wrapped an arm around her, kissing her head. You wrapped your arms around both of them.

"Love you two."

"Love you mami, papi."

You and Maddie dog piled on Raf.

"Love you two too. I will always be here to protect the two of you."

Maddie was already asleep, on his chest, you laid your head on his shoulder kissing him.

"I know you will and I will always love you for it."


	7. Chapter 7

**15 years Later**

You and Raf has been married for almost 13 years, about a year and a half after you got pregnant, it came as a shock You and Raf welcomed a baby boy, Maddie was 25 years old now, married with three kids one adopted 10 year old daughter, two biological twins both boys. Maddie was a social service worker she hit the idea when she was in high school and a school counselor suggested it. She had overcome what had happen to her as a child. Raf and you were proud of her. As you sat there watching Raf, your son and your grandchildren play. Raf came over and sat beside you.

"Hi." You whispered.

"Hey." Raf kissed you.

Your 3 year old grandson ran up to you.

"Abuelo, play?"

"Abuelo, is tried nieto."

Raf picked him up,

"I'll come play in a few, go play with Javier."

He ran off, leaving the two of you alone.

You looked at Raf.

"What is it, mi amor."

"I love you." You whispered.

Raf smirked leaning in.

"I love you to." He kissed you.

You broke the kiss, laying your head on his shoulder.

"Thank you for letting me have a beautiful family." Raf whispered.

"Thanks for protecting it, loving us, and become a part of it." You whispered.


End file.
